The Threeway: Top 3 Things to Dread About J.J. Abrams’ “Star Wars”

3smallSo apparently the interwebs blew up last night with the rumor that J.J. Abrams is in line to direct “Star Wars: Episode VII – A New Cash Cow.” While attaching a big name director this early in the process is par for the course, and has a high probability to shift at some point, I’m fairly happy with the news. I have enjoyed Abrams’ work for a while and his revitalization of “Star Trek” left me hopeful for the franchise’s future.

But then this wouldn’t be Sweep the Leg if I just said I was pleased and left it that; now, would it?

So here’s a quick and dirty Threeway of the things I’m dreading the most from the upcoming Abrams-led sequel.

3. Lightsabers will consist of nothing but lens flare.

2. Old Yoda will travel back in time to convince Young Yoda to not let Anakin train. There will be lots of long, uncomfortable shots where we’re convinced they’re about to make out.

1. Non-nerds will never, ever correctly identify “Star Wars” and “Star Trek” again.

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Announcing! Star Trek Into Darkness

Not sure why this is an “announcement” and not a teaser, but whatever. The first 1 minute, edited for showcase before feature films, featuring a blatant rip off of the “Inception” music (to go with the blatant ripoff of the “Dark Knight” poster) for “Star Trek Into Darkness” has been thrust upon us. What does JJ and the gang have in store for us?

Some thoughts:

  • I love (LOVE) the shot of the blond chick screaming (and the sound extending for a few seconds). I’ve watched the trailer a few times and it gets me every time.
  • I guess we are getting an Enterprise water landing? Maybe someone will edit in a clip of Data saying he can be used as a floatation device from “Insurrection.” (Yeah, I just made an “Insurrection” reference. Take that nerdlings!)
  • Benedict Cumberbatch does great voice over. Maybe he can be the next Morgan Freeman. I love the “So, shall we begin” at the end of the trailer. Gives it a good tone to finish on.
  • The big question is who is Benedict Cumberbatch playing? The geek money is on Kahn. Hard to believe that JJ could keep that big of a secret though. I hope it isn’t Kahn. I’d rather see this movie live on its own. The Next Gen crew tried their Kahn/”Star Trek II” remake with “Nemesis” and that didn’t work out too well.

The Threeway: Top 3 ThinkGeek T-Shirts (Anthony’s Take)

3smallNot content to merely flirt around with ThinkGeek’s prodigious t-shirt catalog last week; we decided we needed a little more time to really dive in and pick out the gems. Made of cotton. Cotton gems, then. Like lint balls. Only…geeky…

On with the shirts!

d3e6_interesting#3: I had to include at least one “Firefly” shirt. Since I actually owned the “Curse your sudden, but inevitable betrayal” model at one point, I figured I should include this, more obscure, but equally delicious, Wash reference. Be a leaf on the wind when you wear it. Continue reading

The Threeway: Top 3 ThinkGeek Products (Adam’s Take)

ThinkGeek.com is wonderland. Every page holds an image of a product that I *must* have. Every single page. To prove this to myself – I just clicked on the “Doctor Who” page. I’m not even a Who fan – but I would totally love the heat changing TARDIS coffee mug. And that board game looks interesting as well. Thus, this week’s topic is hard. How can I narrow down the Top 3 products on their site? I can probably find three in the “Star Wars” section alone. Let alone food. And caffeinated soap? I do so want to try that someday.

BTW – off topic here for a second, but as I surf through the site this has me perplexed – why does thinkgeek.com categorize Bacon and Zombies together? They don’t even have any combiner zombie bacon ideas. Like a zombie-fied wild boar. They have a Star Trek Zombie shirt – why isn’t that a dual category? What purpose does this serve? Do zombies secretly love bacon as well?

Any rate, on with the Countdown: Continue reading

You Got Hobbits in my Warp Drive!

Need more incentive to go see “The Hobbit” when it drops next month? Fancy your fantasies to have phasers instead of wizard spells and aliens instead of elves? Then you’re in luck! If you pony up for an I-MAX 3-D ticket, you’ll be treated to an extended 9-minute preview of “Star Trek: Into Darkness.”

I didn’t need any more incentive to see Bilbo get conned into working gratis for a bunch of dwarves; but this certainly doesn’t hurt. EW has the original story.

The Threeway: Top 3 Things Missing From My Geek Resume (Adam’s Take)

I know I’m a geek. I’m the guy everyone calls when they get that “Star Trek” question in trivia. Need to know the lyrics to the “Silver Spoons” theme song? I’ll sing it to you. Trying desperately to remember which 80s robot with an acronym name was on the show “Small Wonder?” I can give you the breakdown (and remind you of the one from “D.A.R.Y.L.” as well).

But, even I have gaps in the geek resume. It’s like that scene in “Jurassic Park” where they tell you what DNA is – and how there were missing pieces in the Dino Code. If Seth Green or Chris Hardwick are the geek gods, then I’m the DNA offshoot. Instead of a complete code, I meshed in extra “Star Wars” novels or something. Hell, I hadn’t even seen all of “Wizard of Oz” until a few years ago.

So, what’s missing? Continue reading

Streaming Saturday: Star Trek – TOS

Because this is happening this weekend:

I find your joke about trading building materials for farm animals highly illogical, Captain.

And because everyone will be walking around with fancy new wireless communicators welded to the sides of their faces. There really was only choice for this weekend’s traipse through the streaming queue. That’s right, it’s time to put on your red shirt (or dye your skin green if you’re that kind), shave that evil goatee, and tell the spouse that they should prepare themselves for the Pon Farr; we’re streaming “Star Trek: The Original Series!”

This is classic sci-fi at its best – the set values are minuscule, the acting horrid, but the stories that they brought to the table engaged, nay, spawned, a generation of geeks like no other television series ever has. So pay some respect to Kirk, Bones, and their pointy-eared friend. And if you can’t muster that, just take a shot every time they have to lean back and forth like the bridge is tilting; you’ll be hammered by the third episode.

Got Dilithium Crystals for Orion Slave Girls?

Hey! You! With the “Captain’s Log” toilet paper and set of classic insignia Star Trek t-shirts (one for each rank). So you say that you love to play Settlers of Catan with your friends, but can’t stand it’s complete lack of Star Trek?

BEHOLD!

 

Now available at your local Target. Seriously. Who knew?

Friday Diversion: Patrick Stewart on Extras

Here at Sweep-the-Leg we know that work time is precious. A time to put your head down and get be productive. Work harder, get ahead.

Well… then there’s Friday afternoon. We all need a diversion on Friday afternoons. So, here’s your Friday Diversion (and, as always, we can’t promise that these are all SFW, but we’ll try).

Today’s diversion… Patrick Stewart (“Star Trek: TNG” and “X-men” among other noble pursuits) once guest starred on the show “Extras.” The result was… Pure Awesome. Watch it. Make It So.