Iron Man 3 Trailer (For Realsies This Time)

Not a joke! Not a hoax! The full trailer for “Iron Man 3” hit the web last night. Check it out in all its “RDJ sports boy-band hair” glory.

You good? I’m good. I’m tingly. Mandarin’s introductory line in the trailer “Ladies, children, sheep…” is a freaking glorious setup for the character and sets an absolutely perfect tone for what appears to be the deconstruction of Tony Stark. Seriously, I’ve watched this trailer a dozen times already. I’m listening to it right now as I type this out. I. Cannot. Wait.

Let’s do a guided tour for some of the more interesting bits, shall we?

  • :19 – Shades of the “Demon in a Bottle” storyline as Tony talks about dealing with the stress of NYC and “Avengers”
  • :21 – Our first shot of the “Extremis” type armor, where it flies on to him in pieces (wonder if they’ll go the full “Extremis” route and he’ll end up with the armor embedded in the hollows of his bones)
  • :38 – Sentient armor? About freaking time – his armor has gained sentience and gone rogue at least a dozen times in the comics (also in the “Demon in a Bottle” storyline, natch). It’s actually a really clever way to shoehorn in another villain without having to, y’know, add another villain.
  • :48 – Iron Patriot! That’s definitely Roddy in his dolled up War Machine armor. My guess is that it serves a similar purpose here as it did in the comics (superficially at least) – when Iron Man is gone (and Captain America is out to lunch) this armor theoretically provides the symbolism to fill the gaps and ease the panic.
  • :52 – Tony going under the knife could go one of two ways – further integration of the armor (ala late issues of “Extremis”) or a (most decidedly doomed) attempt to remove the arc reactor and give up being Iron Man.
  • :59 – Mandarin’s rings! That they focused on them…I can’t tell you how much joy this brings me. It’s like the director said: “Shhhh, nerds – I get it. See?”
  • 1:00 – In case you were doubting the sentient armor angle, here’s a shot of the armor menacing our fair hero.
  • 1:15 – Can anyone make a trailer anymore without the “Inception” BROOOOOOONG? No. No they cannot.

Other bits such as Tony defeated (though I’m guessing at least a few of those shots are of the armor being defeated), Pepper in peril, Mandarin as a terrorist, paint the major characters beautifully and set the board for what should be a thrilling chess match.

April can’t get here fast enough.

Iron Man 3 Trailer! Update: Now With Bonus Mandarin Action!

…for the trailer, that is.

In a world where no bit of media can be sliced and diced up enough, there’s a 17 second trailer out for the LONGER trailer that will be out…sometime? I don’t know. What I do know is that it worries me when the hype machine starts THIS early. Fingers crossed that IM can get its legs back after the debacle that was “Iron Man 2.”

Still, nice motion shots of the new armor, Tony’s new doo, and Pepper in peril. Watch if you like your trailers like you like your romantic encounters: exceedingly short and completely unsatisfying.

UPDATE: Well not “action,” per se, as this is a still shot; but it’s still our first gander of Sir Ben Kingsley as Mandarin (care of EW). Can’t wait to see him chewing the screen; by default, he has to be better than Mumbles the Drunken Russian Rourke.

Movie Quote Monday

This is another of those movies that don’t quite fit with the whole Halloween theme; but damn if it isn’t one of the most disturbing scenes ever. I saw this movie once over 20 years ago and I still can replay it fully in my head.

I will show you the life of the mind!

You know the rules. If you know the movie – put more quotes below. If you don’t know, fess up and ask for the title and then watch it. Well, that scene at least (the rest of the movie can be somewhat daunting to get through).

The Threeway: Best Horror Movies (Anthony’s Take)

Man, when we were talking this topic over, I was so very gung-ho on it. “Horror movies! Yeah! Let’s go write about that scary stuff with the guys and the blood and the monster thingy!”

Then I remembered that I’m a huge wimp that doesn’t watch all that many horror movies because they make me feel funny in my tummy and I have to sleep with the lights on and my special blanket for a month. I only watched them in my youth because I was promised boobs…what I didn’t count on was the high frequency with which said boobs would be featured in tandem with arterial spray.

I’ve got issues.

Don’t look up my nose

3) “The Blair Witch Project” – Yes, yes; I know. I know. “It’s not scary!” “It’s stupid!” “It’s barely a movie!” I recognize all of the issues of Blair Witch; it has far more detractors at this point than it does proponents. But there is one very key element that’s easy to forget now that the “found footage” film is a genre in and of itself. Blair Witch was the first. And for an audience that was unused to the shaky-cam footage and the sheer intimacy that the medium allows, that made all the difference. Watching it that first time, it was easy to laugh off the lacking cinematography, groan at the over-the-top acting. But then something happened that I wasn’t expecting, I started to believe the narrative (because why else would we be watching such poor footage?). Once that had locked in, each subsequent twist and escalation of the scenario felt that much more visceral and the division between their reality and mine lessened. To the point where, when I was walking back to my car through a darkened back lot, I found myself nearly sprinting. Blair Witch made me suspend my disbelief in a very fundamental way and, while I recognized the trick, I was unable to steel myself against it.

dun-dun-da-dun-dun-dun-daaaaa-dun-dun-da-dun-dun

2) “Halloween” gets a spot on this list for not just being one of the top horror franchises; but for creating a franchise based on a character that is practically devoid of all emotion. “Nightmare on Elm Street” has a wise-cracking demon. “Friday the 13th” has an unhinged killing machine. “Halloween” though…Michael Myers is practically pedantic in comparison. He is dogged in his goal and the killing that happens along the way doesn’t feel personal or even malicious; it’s more “they were in my way.” What cinches the entire franchise for me though is the music. Those three bars of plinky piano are enough to give me chills and make me start checking behind closet doors. I still remember the first time I watched “Halloween” at 3:00 AM, my friends passed out on the floor around me, and completely freaking out when the piano music started. Let me tell you, drunken college students don’t enjoy someone flipping on every light in the house at 3:00 AM.  Continue reading

The Threeway: Top 3 Superhero Movies (Janie’s Take)

Okay, my turn.   I understand both Adam & Anthony’s opinions and agree with some of them.  But some…not so much.

Here’s my take on Superhero films (which I fear is going to lead to me receiving some sort of Pollyanna label): I like my heroes to be heroes. There are exceptions to that rule, because I don’t mind my heroes to be a wee bit naughty (a la Tony Stark). But I’m a little sick of the tortured hero.  I get it, we all struggle with the battle of good and evil within each of us.  But with where I am in my life, I want less Dark Knight and more Captain America.

I guess I said that to prepare everyone for why none of the Dark Knight pics made it onto my list. Without further ado, my favorites:

#3: The Fifth Element

Okay, go ahead and scoff, but I’m putting it on the list anyway. Leeloo is perhaps more alien than superhero, but the fact is: she has superhuman strength, is willing to sacrifice herself to fight evil, and she has a costume*. Thus, in my book, she’s a superhero. Add that to Bruce Willis’ antihero and you’ve got a great mix. I loved this movie in 1997. Still do.

Plus, let’s face it, part of my job on this blog is to bring the ladies into the geek conversation as much as possible.  If we want to have a real discussion, let’s talk about the serious lack of female superhero movies. I mean, what do you want me to put on the list, ElectraCatwoman? Barb Wire???

* – if you don’t believe that’s a costume, wait until I wear it for Comic Con 2014

#2 The Incredibles

I know, I know, the mother of four speaks.  But I want to say first that I am not a big animated film fan, so for me to put this on the list should be a statement of how much I like it.  This is storytelling at its very best. It’s gut-bustingly funny, appeals to adults and children, has awesome action, but most importantly has heart. A classic from the moment it hit the screen.

Ummm… and did I mention I loved this movie so much we named our youngest daughter JacJac?

#1 The Avengers

Two words: Joss Whedon.  You’ve either seen it and love it or you don’t have a pulse. ‘Nuff said.

(And every night I say a prayer to the Hollywood gods that they will make a Black Widow/Hawkeye spinoff. In the name of Spielberg, Scorsese, and Hitchcock. Amen.)

Streaming Saturday: Captain America

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So it’s the weekend, you’re staring at your Netflix streaming queue, and realize that the only thing you have left is that “Madea Gets Bunions” movie that you added on a dare. Don’t worry, Streaming Saturday is here to help save your eyeballs.

Avengers, almost assemble! “Iron Man 2” has been on Netflix forever, “Thor” and his totally unphallic hammer have been flitting about for a month or so, but this Saturday is the first time that the titular head of the Avengers, Captain America, will be available for streaming.

Out of last summer’s Marvel movies, this was my favorite. Cap’s rise to the occasion was a bit ham-handed, the USO stint just dragged the plot down, but once Cap came into his own, I felt it was a really enjoyable action/WW II flick. And Chris Evans owned the part of the Captain (big-headed CGI during the “puny Steve” sequences aside). He managed to bring just enough Boy Scout to the role, but in a more “be prepared and do good” and less of a “golly gee, that Mr. Hitler’s a bad egg” kind of way. Hugo Weaving had some great scene chewing as well and I’d love to see him come back in some capacity in future Marvel flicks. Plus, with the announcement of Winter Soldier being the focus of the next movie, you’ll want to get up to date on Bucky Barnes’ backstory.

So fire up your Netflix feed machine and queue up “Captain America: The First Avenger” for a quality small screen popcorn flick. You won’t be disappointed.

Movie Unview: The Dark Knight Rises

I was going to say something pithy about the new Gravel Voice vs. Fetish Mask movie (oh, look, I just did); but then…well…

This.

As a comic book fan, Hell, as a moral human being, it’s incomprehensible to me that there are those who read these escapists fantasies and find inspiration not in those who bring justice, but those who would destroy it. Rumors that the attack in Aurora was patterned after issues of the Dark Knight Returns turns my stomach even further.

No one should be afraid to see a movie with their fellow fans. Adam said it much better than I and if you haven’t read his article yet, you really should. I just wanted to let everyone know that there is something that we can do to make a difference.

We can go to the movies. We can make sure the asshole with the gun doesn’t have the last say.

Hold the Pepper

Iron Man 3With Iron Man 3 currently shooting, and SDCC bombarding us with every twist and turn you can shake a geek at, new plot points and factoids are bound to come out. What’s the new armor look like? Who’s the villain? How incredibly awesome will it be to hear Downey spouting off Shane Black dialogue again?

Then you hear the thing that makes you fall to your knees and shriek to the heavens “noooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!” The LA Times is floating out the rumor that Pepper Potts may get her own armor in the next installment. WTF? Don’t tell me that it happened in the comics a few years ago (and that her character “Rescue” is a reoccurring character). I don’t care. I care about what will make a good movie. More Gweneth Paltrow is already bad enough. But more Pepper? Saving the day? The only way this is a good idea is if the bad guy shoots her out of the sky and Iron Man goes on fury of vengeance.

What say you? Am I missing the boat here? Or, is this truly a horrible idea?