The Threeway: Top Three Star Wars Characters that Most Deserve Stand-Alone Movies (The Other Adam’s Take)

3smallWell I’m usually not one to get in the way of a threeway, but with a topic this juicy I just had to get up and awkwardly insert myself into it. Star Wars has really fallen flat for me over the years, but with new life being breathed into it the franchise, it gives me hope that we can finally move beyond the steaming pile that was the prequels.  So without further delay, here are my top 3 picks.

Boba

3. Boba Fett – Yes this is the one that everyone picks, but shit people it’s Boba Fucking Fett, and the more you know about his badass exploits. The more you want more story behind that wookie killing mo-fo. I would rather see something other then him falling head first into a man-eating, desert anus.

2. The Millenium Falcon – I know it’s not a person, but damn it’s Millennium_Falconthe fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy! If it wasn’t for that ship, Luke and Obi would still be sitting at that Mos Eisley bar staring at each other’s drinks after another long awkward silence. We could actually start off with Lando as the captain, and then see the whole saga of how he ends up losing her to Han.

Alderaan1. Alderaan Survivors – You know what happens when your peaceful blue/green planet gets blown to tiny pieces by a dildo trying to make a point, and his asthmatic lackey? You get pissed. The Alderaan Survivors who joined the Rebel Alliance after their planet’s destruction end up being rather hardcore. Heck they man the ion cannon on Hoth, knowing that it most likely means a death sentence, but that doesn’t matter when you have a score to settle. Just imagine a movie that focuses on some of the most pissed off people in the galaxy getting their revenge on the Empire. Heck I can see the trailer for this movie now; it would be one giant “BRAAAAAHHHHMMMMM.”

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5 thoughts on “The Threeway: Top Three Star Wars Characters that Most Deserve Stand-Alone Movies (The Other Adam’s Take)

  1. “Man-Eating Desert Anus” is the name of my alien cantina cover band.

    And I’d pay good money to see either 2 or 1. I like the idea of looking at things from non-central perspectives.

  2. Millennium Falcon – that’s the best effin idea any of us have ever had. Can you take regular Adam’s place in the Three Way from now on?

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